“I love you.”

“Why?”

“I don’t know. I just… do.”

Sound familiar? You’ve probably found yourself in a similar situation before—being dumbfounded when asked why you love someone, or even being at a loss for words when asked how you would define love. The very notion of “love” is an enigma that eludes a singular understanding, as it is an abstract concept so convoluted that almost everybody has a different perception of love. 

In the English language, we say the word “love,” while most of the time being unconscious of the many meanings this may elicit in various individuals—one person’s definition of love will never be the same as the other. There may be about a million ways to define this phenomenon, but the word “love” acts as a multipurpose word that is meant to act in place of every variance of meaning one could possibly create.

However, in the Arabic language there are multiple ways to express the word love. These alternative forms of the word “love” emerged from the plethora of romantic Arabic poetry over time. While many of these are used exclusively in poetic form, it’s still interesting to take a close look at these variations in order to understand just how vast the interpretations of love in the Arabic language is, especially in celebration of World Arabic Language Day.

To start, it’s worth noting that there exists somber forms of love in the Arabic language, which is understandable given that too much, too little, or misdirected love can be harmful to any heart fallen victim to it.

The Arabs call the love that consumes the heart which can lead to it being killed emotionally as الشَّعَف, read as ‘Asha”af. This shows that the heart can be shattered by the very thing it represents—love. As overused as the comparison may be, we can view love as a double-edged sword. Then, we can’t completely dismiss the reality of the one holding the blade stabbing themselves right through the heart when they’re either too blinded by passion to hold the blade steadily, or overcome with grief at the absence of their lover’s hand to grip the other pointy end.

Coupled with this, the Arabic language also has a term for a love that feels like one is losing something, particularly their mind: الوَلَه which is read as ‘Al Walah. To those who love and are loved, it may be an intrusive suggestion to pose that something as rewarding as love could one day take so much away from you. Which is why it is especially tragic when love is depicted like ‘Al Walah, to lose something as precious as the mind, such a pinnacle part of your identity, in the pursuit of something so innocent—something that was meant to complete you, but instead, took away a vulnerable side of your soul.

Though, perhaps one of the most heartbreaking depictions of love ever recorded in all written and spoken language is the concept of الجَوَى or ‘Al Jawa, a love that pains the heart with grief and distress so much so that it can cause the lover to give up on love. Such an upsetting interpretation of love does exist—the type of love that makes you want to forfeit loving altogether. Oftentimes in extreme situations, love, damaged by grief and distress, can metamorphose into hate, the very antithesis of love. 

Perhaps the world would be much gentler if these types of love didn’t exist, however, such is our reality. After all, it would be cruel to expect every relationship to unfold like a romance film or novel. It is evident through these Arabic words for love mostly mentioned in poetry that even in pieces of delicate literature, melancholic representations of love exist, for an effective and relatable poem is always, to some extent, grounded in reality.

In a similar vein, love can be so raw and strong that the bare denotation “love” holds isn’t apt enough to describe the deep and fervent yearning one has for their lover. The English language can only do so much to try and capture its very essence, be it in prose or poetry. For love that’s explosive as it is intense, the Arabic language has the right words.

To start with, the word for love when it is a longing or deep faithfulness is called الصَّبابةُ,  A’ssibaba. This type of love is typically present in people who have taken a leap off into the precipice. It is the love that sits in your heart, and it’s so heavy it’s almost tangible. It is love in its rawest form, and it is love in the quiet of the night with your loved one sleeping peacefully next to you. Without a doubt, A’ssibaba is a type of love that is strong and devoted, but also painful in a somewhat comforting way.

Furthermore, love is also notorious for setting one’s heart ablaze. It is fiery and scalding, and it is as warm as it is dangerous. This love is called الشَّغَف, read as ‘Ashaghaf. The Arabs describe this love to be burning, as the heart is overtaken by passion. Often, there is so much to be said about passion, and to have it present within the context of love makes it a double-edged sword. Much like how fire breathes life, it also destroys; with so much passion to the point of burning, “too much” is a befitting phrase to describe it. But for passion to derive from love, there had come a point when its fire didn’t provide pain but warmth.

The Arabic language also has a word for a strong love that makes one lose all sense of reason; a love that cannot live without the lover. This love is called الهِيام, read as Al Hiyam. Having negative connotations in its description, this type of love evokes the sense of codependence. After all, it cannot live without its lover, and as one fosters this type of love, they lose their judgment. However, much of love is built on this feeling—it is love that is often felt in the peak of a relationship. Whether it comes crashing down or transitions into something a lot calmer varies from relationship to relationship.

Love is rarely characterized by these levels of intensity in real life, and these concepts mainly exist within writing only. However, to be given a name means to be born. A love that’s bright, burning, and heartfelt is a love that exists, though this love may not be identified as such until given better context—the context that we see Arabic poetry and literature try to define and encapsulate. 

To be precise, there is little the mere word “love” can capture fully. The feeling and experience itself is too nuanced and far too complex to simply be chalked up as “love”, and that is because love looks and feels different for everyone. Love exists somewhere we haven’t trekked and in someone we do not know. Love is both ugly and bad as well as beautiful and nice. It is innate in us to know that while we know love, it has a different look in everybody’s eyes.

In general, love is its own language that destroys all barriers. Despite having limited words that can accurately describe the emotion, the fact that other languages hold their own unique concept for a feeling that is felt by people from different parts of the world is nothing short of a testament to the universality of love and its byproducts. The Arabic language, in all its creativity and vibrance, is just one of the many gateways to worlds previously unobserved, and it stands to reason that love can be anything or anyone at all.

Reminder: While it is interesting to dissect and interpret these stages of love as the Arabic language would have it, it is still challenging to grasp the full nuances that inevitably get lost along translation. Thus, it is important to bear in mind that while the authors of the article talk about these particular stages of love, there are a number of contexts that might not have been discussed or explored further, as neither of the authors are native or fluent speakers of the Arabic language.